I blame Tumblr.
I’d never have come up with the Hitachi Magic Wand on my own. Magic Wands are these vibrators women like because the vibrations are super strong. Like, you could vibrate the tusks off an elephant with one of those things, and according to Tumblr, a boy can vibrate himself to orgasm right through his cage without his keyholder being any the wiser too. You don’t even have to visit a sex shop or have it shipped in a brown paper wrapper, because a Magic Wand isn’t a sex toy. It’s a “personal health product.” Here’s to your health, am I right?
Now if you’re thinking that it takes a certain amount of premeditation to order a vibrator, wait for it to be shipped, keep an eye out for it so you can hide the box from your boyfriend, and then hold it up against your cage for fifteen or twenty minutes, you’re entirely right. I can’t exactly claim an errant Magic Wand fell on my cage out of nowhere and got stuck there.
But I didn’t know what would happen next.
It’s not that I want out of the cage. The cage keeps me good, and I’ve been GOOD. Graham is my Lord and Master. I spend every afternoon getting myself ready for him, making myself buff and beautiful, clean and shaved, soft and ready. And I am ready too—ready to pounce on him the moment he walks through the door. But I don’t. I don’t pounce on him. I give him appropriate amounts of affection per our agreement.
I take his coat. I hang up his suit while he changes into something more comfortable. I pour him a glass of wine, go down on him while he tells me about his day, serve him a hot meal, and then, only then, do I get fucked. I’m so GOOD. He tells me too, tells me I’m his angel and he’s lucky to have me.
But occasionally …
See, the devil who sits on my other shoulder is one seriously horny motherfucker and sometimes when the chores are done and Graham’s not home yet, I get to browsing Tumblr, just to pick up some ideas about how I can be a better sub, or so the plan goes, but one link leads to another and pretty soon my cage is tight and my nipples are hard and at times like that a little stimulation wouldn’t go amiss.
The first day I used it, I came home from work and there was the package from Amazon and I had to tear into it immediately because I couldn’t have Graham come home and ask what was in the box, right? I pull this thing out of the box. It looks, in case you somehow haven’t ever seen one, nothing like a dick. But that’s OK because a dick can’t do anything for my dick and Tumblr says, so I gotta believe.
I plug that sucker in (which is the key to the strength of its vibrations if you want an electrician’s opinion on this, not that anyone asked, but a couple of triple A batteries have got nothing on a hundred and twenty volts coming right from the tap) and cue up some porn. I mostly watch porn where the bottom’s in a cage these days because I love how the cage flops back and forth when the top’s giving it to him hard, and there’s a great new video of this big leather daddy with his dick scrunched down smaller than mine, which is hot, hot, hot, and I apply the wand and bzzz.
The porn’s already got me as hard as the cage allows me to get, so I rub that sucker all over my balls, my taint, right up against the cage, feeling for the sweet spot. It’s good shit. I mean, it’s very specific, doesn’t feel anything like stroking your dick, just this intense buzz right where it’s applied and when I touch it to the cage it makes the cage rattle all the way around my cock but so completely insufficient. So fucking light, just this tick, tick, tick of cool metal against hot skin.
Maybe I’ve abused my cock over the years (hey, quiet down back there; I heard that), but I could use a little more grip, more applied force, if you get me. The wand vibrates with the speed of hummingbird wings but with the cage in the way, it’s all second-hand.
But I do manage to come eventually and it’s OK. It definitely doesn’t have the zing of my handsfree orgasms with Graham because instead of feeling like we accomplished something together I feel like I cheated on him. Also, does that count as handsfree? I was holding the wand.
Anyway, I hide the thing in the back of the messiest drawer of the desk. I’ll know if he’s ever in there because he’ll immediately start bitching at me about why don’t I clean this shit out. Then I look at the time and see that, shit, that took longer than I realized. I barely manage to scramble everything together before Graham gets in the door, but I’m a good boy for him so I figure there’s no harm in the occasional buzz, right?
At first, I’m buzzing on Monday or Tuesday, so as not to ruin my big bang Friday night. Then Monday and Tuesday. Then Sunday if Graham has to go into work, so Sunday, Monday, Tuesday. And even that wouldn’t have been so bad except my ass never does stop sliding down the slippery slope once it lands on it and pretty soon I’m trying to buzz out a second orgasm to top off the first one.
The thing about a so-so climax is you get to wishing for a better one, even though the second one never is better, and if it takes a long time to buzz one out, you can imagine how long it takes to buzz out two, which means the inevitable happens and Graham comes home and catches me at it.
I figure I’m going over his knee, but no. He gets this evil grin on his face and says if we’re going to keep a wand in the house, he’s going to use it. And I’m like, o-kaaaay, because that was what I’d been working on when he came in—firing the second rocket. Then he takes me out of my cage and I’m like whoa, why am I getting mid-week treats?
Something’s telling me this isn’t going to be as good as my dick thinks it’s going to be but Graham’s hot when he’s mad, and my dick’s roaming free, so it gets good and hard and then he ties me up, spread-eagle on the bed and my dick’s definitely all the way up now. I love a good bondage session and the only thing better than an orgasm with my cage on is an orgasm with my cage off.
But this is where the wand comes in. He lays it up against my dick so the big head is vibrating right over my most sensitive spot and now I understand just how powerful that thing is. I squirm away because nice, but ow, and that makes him fetch a roll of duct tape and that’s when things get serious.
I can’t help but come. Even though it hurts. There’s a fucking vibrator taped to my dick—of course I come. I come in these painful jerks, and if you thought I was begging him to take it off before I came, you should’ve heard me after, but he just stood there as my dick got more and more sensitive, arms folded over his chest, listening to the mechanical hum and me screaming, grinning like the fucking sadist he is.
Three times, that thing made me come, each time more horribly painful, the last one like dry heaves—all the spasms with none of the spew—until I’m not even begging anymore, just crying, and finally I figure out how to make it stop and call red.
Graham unties me and brings me into the shower to clean me up, then dresses me in my softest PJs and gives me cuddles in bed. He asks me if I want the cage back on and I tell him I do. Graham’s cage is my safe space. It feels good to be small and soft again.
Then he asks me if we’re going to keep a Magic Wand in the house and I tell him no. I get out of bed and take that evil wand and stuff it way down deep into the garbage. I never want to see it again. Honestly, I’m not sure I ever want to have another orgasm again either.
But that’ll probably change.